Saturday, October 8, 2011

kids... we have an invitation situation.

friends and neighbors, boys and girls, bored and random trollers of the interwebs...  we have a SITUATION. 

one of the many critical pieces of the wedding experience is the invitation suite - i mean, it even has a fancy name - so clearly this is critical.  soooo..  months and months ago, the devin and i embarked upon the great save the date / invitation search.  devin took it like a champ (he actually thinks this component is as important as i do), i devolved into a catatonic, monosyllabic zombie that began shaking and heading towards the nearest bar after hours of fonts, inks, papers, packages, liners, evelopments, blah blah blah....

one thing that came out of this experience was realizing that devin and i have completely different design sense.
me: clean, sophistcated, almost architectural
devin: ornate, intricate, scroll-y

and sooooo -- the first compromise in ON.  luckily - we are pretty good compromisers, and each willing to step to the middle a bit in this process.  i am not one of these girls that has dreamt of their wedding day their entire life or put pillow cases on her head and played bride....  i was the child that thought a husband should live in the house next door to yours so you could see him whenever you wanted and then go home.  while there is nothing fundamentally wrong with dreaming of your big day -- i could never imagine it, without having actually met the person that i might, in fact, do this with.  and so, here we are.

anyhoozle -- the shock of our divergent design sensibilities aside, we actually landed fairly easily upon a save the date design that made us both happy... and, we thought, told the beginning of our 'wedding story' (devin is in marketing, you know...).  ivory cardstock, charcoal thermography printed (these are things you learn when sucked into wedding world), subtle design nod towards our island location, a little humor....  i, of course, can't leave anything 'stock' -- and so, i lovingly cut vellum overlays and hand tied every mother-effing one with silver ribbon....  perfect.  done.  we got this.

well, we had such luck with our save the dates (courtesy of wedding paper divas and william arthur)....  that upon invitation time, we went back to the source.  how could they steer us wrong?  the save the dates exceeded our every expectation!  we began narrowing down the prospects and pricing packages...  i selected some that were more 'me' and some that were more 'devin'.. and some in the middle.  hey!  i am getting good at this "compromising" stuff!

we make our selection!
design. done.
font. done.
wording. done.
spacing. done.
rsvps. done.
thank yous. done.
envelopes. yep.
inner envelopes.  check.
annnnd we pay (gulp).

as a stress-prone, over-thinking, over-analyzing, probably borderline OCD blushing bride - i cannot tell you the weight that was lifted off my shoulders after that final CLICK.  major piece of the puzzle in place... on to the next decision.

i obsessively track the shipment all week, like charting santa clause's sleigh on christmas eve. 
my item is ready for shipment!  fantastic!
my item is in memphis!  yeeeHAW!
my item has landed in NJ!  YO jes bring me dah box alreddddy.
my item is in the local fedex center. wooot woooot!!
MY ITEM IS ON THE TRUCK FOR DELIVERRRRYYYYYY!  get me a xanax!!!!!

after trying to convince devin that i should *really* just go ahead and open these at the office to "proof them" - - i realize i should, in fact, bring them home... so we can OOOH AAAHHH together.  these are his invitations too, and he spent just as much time going through the details as i did.

and so, i LUG the box.  the SIXTEEN POUND box, DOWN four flights of stairs at my hotel...  DOWN two flights of stairs in the subway...  the crowded, rush hour subway...  UP two flights of stairs out of the subway....  UP four flights of stairs to the apartment (top floor, naturally).

DO - DOOO -DO - DOOOOOOOO <those are the trumpets, see>
we open the box.
we take out the inside boxes.
we open them up.
<blink. blink>
THUD.  <that is the sound of panic when we realize that these are NOT what we wanted>

my heart begins racing.  i can literally HEAR the blood pulsing in my head, as it starts throbbing and i try not to go into a full on panic attack.  devin (also disappointed, but not about to lose consciousness like i am) quietly removes himself from the immediate area (he's smart, this one)... and i go into full on damage control mode.

i contact the purveyor to express our, um, extreme under-whelm-ed-ness??  with the product.. and am immediately told, that no detailed explanation is even required....  to send them back and they will credit me the entire amount of my purchase.  this = good.

and THEN the tears come.  i am exhausted, and have just had my little bride feet knocked right out from under me...  this major...  critical.... ginormous weight had only been temporarily lifted from my shoulders... and now, was right back on.. and somehow even heavier the second time around.

to add insult to injury?  you guessed it.
i LUG the box.  the SIXTEEN POUND box, DOWN four flights of stairs at my house...  DOWN two flights of stairs in the subway...  the crowded, rush hour subway...  UP two flights of stairs out of the subway....  UP four flights of stairs to the the hotel....

and the invitation hunt...  is back on.  having now lost 10 days from my schedule and another teensy piece of my sanity.

. . . to be continued (unfortunately)

Monday, September 5, 2011

welcome to dress-topia.

kids -- i simply cannot keep this a secret any longer...  through one of my crazy wedding websites, i was introduced to a shop in virginia.  various bridal stores and designers donate new / sample / overstocked dresses to them, which they sell and use the money to fund the ywca of central virginia.  the programs that directly benefit from the sale of these dresses include: the domestic violence prevention center, transitional and permanent housing centers, mentoring programs for girls and the racial justice program.

does it get any better than that??  i became basically obsessed with this place...  and lo and behold -- they started a blog, where they feature a beautiful amazing dress every single day.  and so the hunt began.  i wasn't sure exactly what i wanted, or what it looked like... but i knew it was going to pop up on there eventually.  mind you, this place has hunnnndnreds of dresses, and this is just the tiniest peek on a daily basis...  but you can call / email and explain what you are looking for and they are more than happy to help.

if you - or someone  you know - is on the market for a gown...  i can tell you that i have seen more than one monique lhuillier gowns -- one just the other day actually that sold for $650 (actual retail was $6,400).  i have seen gowns from monique lhuillier, carolina herrera, christos, reem acra, jim hjelm . . . etc etc.

and then one day....  they posted several short vintage / retro dresses that had been delivered to them by a purveyor in new york.  there was one that caught my eye immediately -- adorrrable.  i emailed asking about the measurements and price.  it was just the teensiest bit too big, but nothing that couldn't be easily altered...  and the price was an equally adorable $300.  i decided to think it over a couple of days.

i kept going back to the picture...  thinking of the different places and/or events that i could wear this dress ...  and easily justifying the cost because of the great work this shop is doing.  i mean -- now that i KNEW about this shop, i simply HAD to buy something from them.  otherwise i might as well just walk around punching people.  who am i to stand in the way of the betterment of women and the empowerment of impressionable girls?

and wouldn't you know.....  just about the time that i have decided that i need and must have this dress, i get an email from the girl at the shop.  oh!  she is so sorry -- she realized that she had, in fact, quoted me the wrong price for the dress.  it is not $300.  no, not at all.  it is $125.  1.  2.  5.  one.  two.  five.  one hundred and twenty-five american dollars.

i am sure you can guess how quickly i responded.  the next day i began to research the brand of dress, and found that they retail between $1200 - $2000.  no, that is not a typo...  i did not accidentally hit the zero too many times.  $1200 - $2000.  you can imagine how my little bridal heart began to race.

within a couple of days, a box arrived to my office...  and as any mature, classy bride would do - i ran squealing into the bathroom, ripped the box open and put that little darling ON.  it is more beautiful than i had imagined and the quality is unbelievable.  and it had, in fact, a $1200 tag still affixed. <woot woot wokka wokka>.  it is the softest seafoam green you can imagine -- and i just want to eat it!!

so....  let me share!  i will post a picture of ME in the dress once it is altered...  but this is the picture from the website... as well as the website itself, in case any of you are looking for a gorgeous dress...  apparently they have more than just bridal -- also other cocktail and formal dresses.  so check them out!

Church Street Bridal Shop  http://churchstreetbridal.blogspot.com/

i also want to share the credit for the photographer that donates his time and skills to the shop (and took the picture of the dress i am sharing!):  david duncan photography http://www.davidduncanphoto.com/





Sunday, April 3, 2011

dry your eyes, kittens -- i'm back!

where. do. we. start.  aye dios mio!

first off -- let's talk "island time."  as you have likely surmised...  we have elected to add an additional layer of stress to this little planning party by deciding on a sun-drenched caribbean locale for said ceremony.  for those that know me (and it appears that at least ten people here do...), i struggle with stress from time to time ...  which lovingly manifests itself in fun ways like 36hour migraines, ulcers (both the stomach AND the THROAT!  joyous!!), insomnia, lock jaw, heart palpitations...  you get it.

sooooo...  SAN JUAN here i come - straight jacket or not!  hopefully not - weird tan lines.  annnyhoo, island time.  this is the laissez-faire tempo you find in places like puerto rico, where nothing seems to go more than 30mph - literally or figuratively.  now - island time is ADORABLE when you are on vacation... NOT when you are on deadlines, or otherwise trying to make THE BIGGEST DECISIONS OF YOUR ENTIRE LIFE.  <breeeeathe...  breeeeeeathe... innnn with the good... oooout with the baaaad....  ommmmm....  ommmmmmm>

the first venue i fell in love with was in old san juan . . . a building that was over 400 years old - the architecture is amazing and i had not seen anything like it.  there is limited information available on the website, and so i call.  it is just about 5 o'clock, and the entire sales team has left for the day (mazel tov!).  a charming gentleman takes all of my information and graciously assures me that someone will contact me the next day regarding availability and rates.  his name is ORville - "like the popcorn" he proudly adds.  so i wait.

and wait.

wait more.

yep.

about three weeks go by (i had gotten pretty swamped with work, and had also started investigating other locations), and i call again.  i explain my predicament to a lovely bubbly young girl, who very thoroughly gets all of my information again gives me some basic details and says...  someone will get back to me the next day.

you can probably guess what happens next.

another week goes by, and i email (i had found my first gentleman's email on their website - orvill, you know) - basically pleading for help at this point...  some other person gets back to me...  but every time i need additional information or accurate information it is days and or a week before i have any response.  i'm sorry - aren't these people trying to SELL something here??  i purposely used my work email in the hopes, that upon seeing that i was actually "in the business," that i might be afforded some level of  'professional courtesy' but alas... 

to be fair, by the time i had to hunt them down a third time - trying to get them to TAKE MY MONEY -- i had made peace with the fact that this was not to be.  with my anxiety -- handing over my big day to these people?  there's not enough valium in beverly hills...  it became almost a game to me...  to see how lacklustre and lacking their service could be...  and wouldn't you guess it.  somewhere in the midst of the unreturned calls and week-long waits for replies... another pair of lovebirds booked our date.  well, best of luck to you i say - you've got much bigger huevos than i do.

during these shenanigans...  i began courting other venues, if you will, for everything from ceremony, to reception, to guest room blocks...  it has been a lesson being on the other side of the hotel / client table for sure.  one barely organized, clearly overworked gent (Omar - of a not to be named very recognizable hotel company) attempted to assist me with information for a room block.  somewhere during the weeks long lapses in communication...  i had written him off, sadly, opting for another, closer, and more responsive hotel.  late one evening i received an email from Omar.  i couldn't imagine why he was emailing me.  i read the email, and thought, "is this guy drunk?"  he answered some questions i had clearly asked at some point, and then apologized for "the delay" explaining that they are "really busy" with all these "wedding requests."  did they teach you that in sales 101?  "how to make the client feel special" by Omar.  still confused by this sudden correspondence, i check the date of his email - March 15.  i scroll down to check the date of my email to him - February 13.

shockingly, in the MONTH+ that had elapsed.... devin and i had "contracted elsewhere."  i suppose i should have waited until may to reply...  after all, i am 'really busy.'

Saturday, January 29, 2011

once upon a time...

ahhhhh, yes.  it all started in vegas.

so...  you might be wondering...  with devin a life-long east coaster, and ashlee firmly planted amidst the palm trees of los angeles....  how in the world did you two meet??  well - grab some coffee (or coy-fee, as dev might say) and find out!  ;o)


i had jetted off to vegas for a couple days to meet up with a very dear friend from dallas, and i was definitely ready to get out of LA for a couple of days . . .


devin had traveled to vegas for work - - or what i like to call, a "geek convention."  little did he know what a geek he would find!!  so, as the fates would have it, on january 28, 2008. . . we both found ourselves at the bar - - or actually, iBar.  it even sounds geeky, right?


devin sees me - across the bar - all alone - in my "i like boys" t shirt, and gallantly decides to send over a little drinkie-poo.  well, now i wouldn't want to be rude (and my gosh, that grey goose was already poured...), so i accept it, give the obligatory 'head nod' and promptly return to my seat next to my friend . . . my male friend.  of course, one cannot tell from across the bar that this is, in fact, one of my dearest (and platonic) male friends . . . and i imagine that devin had visions of getting a drink or a fist in his face at that point . . .


so, being a proper southern girl (thanks mom!), i decided after a few minutes that it was only right that i go over and thank this young man in person.  and how else was i going to see how hot, er handsome, he actually was - those bars are dark in vegas, kids!  i bounce over and introduce myself - and the giggling and hair flipping began!  now, devin will tell you that much of this was done while i was sitting on his lap - but i believe he is embellishing just a bit . . . and those surveillance cameras have been wiped clean by this point... so my word against his - yay! 


we each had dinner plans, so we decided to meet for drinks later that evening.  we reconnected, and went for cocktails at some place that was very high up and offered amazing views of vegas.  i am pretty sure there was some additional giggling and hair flipping (mostly by devin - i was playing it cool), and after very likely one too many cocktails we called it an evening. 


with vague, unconfirmed plans to meet again the next evening - i went about the day with no particular goals.  my friend was working on a project, so i was left to relax and wander . . . gambling has no appeal to me and i actually find casinos marginally depressing.  i had a lovely day to myself, and managed to check the ol' phone for messages every once in a while...  you know, just in case.  after i while i decided, you know, we had fun - it is what it is...  i mean - this IS vegas and the guy lives in NEW YORK.  even if we DID like each other - how would THAT ever work out?


<cue fate - or something> late afternoon, i walk into the lobby of the hotel . . . and that guy (you know, devin) quite literally almost walks right into me.  RUH ROH.  here goes the butterflies and giggling all over again (mine).  we confirmed our plans for the evening and i went to my room to hussy up.


devin and i met at some non-descript hotel bar ( i literally couldn't tell you a thing about it besides, "there were barstools and grey goose" ). the next thing we know - five hours have gone by.  we were both leaving vegas the next day for our respective coasts, so we said our goodnights with a sort of "i'm not sure what just happened or what this is" tone. 


within a couple of days of getting back into our routines, the phone calls started.  every day.  for hours.  i'm not even sure what we talked about - - but clearly we covered just about everything.  thank god for free long distance calls - had this been the early 90's, this courtship would not have been afforded.


we met january 28 - by march, a visit one direction or the other was inevitable.  i had not been to new york in years, so i made the leap.  i went for a long weekend, with nyc friends and an emergency fund at the ready in case i needed to high tail it out of there...  i mean, a lot of things look good from thousands of miles away (right, devin??). 


back in la, the calls / texts / emails / cards continued and by may - it was sort of 'what are we doing?'.  i mean, we were both having a great time getting to know each other, but the logistics were definitely beginning to play a larger part in the story.  i found myself planning a week-long trip to nyc for may. 


so heeeere comes may . . .  mind you, we have only known each other four months at this point - and have only seen each other TWICE in person when i touch down at ol' jfk.  aGAIN - with the butterflies, giggling, and hair flipping (both of us).  i surprise devin with box seats to the yankees (last season in the old stadium - where lou gerhig, dimaggio, babe ruth played!!).  devin surprises me with a (literally) 12 hour marathon party where i am greeted and secretly judged by his in-town family and about 100 (ONE HUNDRED) of his closest friends.


towards the end of the trip (and possibly after a couple or seven beers), devin asked, "why don't you just move here?"  and i am thinking, "i've seen you in person three times... i don't really know anyone... i have no job... where is the beach... that would be one expensive move...  i would have to be crazy... "


back to la... and before i know it (and before i've talked myself out of it), i have quit my job and started packing up my wordly belongings for what may be one of the most exciting or tragic chapters of my life.  within 30 days, i am in new york...


you can pretty much guess how things went from there.  :O)  sure, this is a bit more "my side" of the story, but devin is asleep and has thereby forfeited his editorial input.  and as you might have guessed (and is, i believe, law when anything occurs in or around vegas) some details, dates, times, names, number of cocktails and the like - may have been altered or omitted to protect the innocent.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

my new bff hachik

i know --should someone "my age" really still be labeling people as their BFF?  um, well, when you hand your beautiful sparkly most important piece of jewelry that you have ever had in your entire life off to a complete stranger - and they return it to you in an hour absolutely flawlessly sized and somehow even more sparkly than before - - YES.  yes you should.

so, after receiving this most amazing symbol of devin's adoration of me and all of my flaws and quirks (and let me tell you - there are many, my friends), and joyously slipping it onto that all important ring finger - - well, the ring was a little big.  "AWESOME!!," i exclaimed.  "does this mean i can get fat!?!??"  visions of biscuits 'n gravy . .. chicken friend steak and the like began dancing joyously through my little head . . . Ahhahahahahaaa....  NO.

as you may surmise, after receiving something of this magnitude - - the last thing in the world you want to do is take it off - - let alone pass it off to a complete stranger.  not being an nyc native, and lacking a 'go-to jeweler' here only compounded my fears.  so, i did what any very classy broad would do in my situation: i wore it (for 54 days) with a series of bandaids wrapped around the back of it - much like a starry-eyed high schooler with her boyfriend's ring. 

after numerous puzzled glances, the gentle ribbings of a few co-workers and my exhaustion from applying and reapplying the bandaids (now with an almost surgeon-like precision), i began to research.  as some of you know about me, one of my fun little quirks is my penchant for researching and over-thinking most any situation or dilemma.  now in this case, sure, makes perfect sense....  however, when applied to the more harmless / mundane choices in life - - wherrrrrrre to go for brunch - - probably not quite as charming.

at any rate, after exhaustive research - which included a "dry run" of the area and the business itself, naturally - i finally almost kind of tentatively cautiously sort of settled on Royal Jewel Setting (yes, Mom, you may insert your Princess remark here: _______ ).  now, the 'dry run' of the place almost counted it out before i made it to the door.  have you BEEN to the diamond district in new york city???  oh my god.  honestly, i feel compelled to shower after walking through that area . . . . "oooooooh prrrretty lady needa diamondss??"  "heelloooo beeeauty"  "you come in - i have jewels almost as beautiful as yooou"  it's like dodgeball - except with sleazeballs (sorry diamond district and the numerous purveyors of jewels in the vacinity).  for anyone headed to that area:  keep your hands in your pockets, walk fast and with purpose (i actually perfected a diamond district stomp, should you need assistance), and do NOT make eye contact with the barkers.  they see it as a sign of weakness and will go in for the kill.

the day of the dry run, the master jeweler wasn't there - which was fine, it afforded me the opportunity to gather intel and get a feel for his surroundings...  sort of stalking my prey, if you will.  now, the place is a workshop - or possibly a work-closet - there are no gucci-suited security men opening glass doors for you as you enter....  nothing wrong with the place, i'm just saying - it is a no-frills "this is where the work is done kind of place."  hachik (the aforementioned master jeweler) was not in at the moment, but his nephew michael was very charming (and not in the smarmy diamond district kind of way) and adeptly answered the numerous questions i machine-gunned at him.

what do you recommend??
what is the advantage of this over that?
how long have you been here?
what are your qualifications?
what size is the ring?
what size should it be?
how will it get there?
how do you clean it?
what if you loosen the stones?
how long will it take?
how much will it cost?
can i stand here and stare creepily while it is fixed?
what if there is a robbery?
do you know martial arts?
how many questions can i ask before you call security?

i left feeling encouraged.  despite the dicey business practices of some of his neighbors, hachik's little workshop seemed a respite from all that.  this might just be the guy.

a little over a week later, in snow and slush and 15 degree windchill (genius), i decided TODAY is the day.  just suck it up and get in there champ.  time to RRRRriiiipppP off the ol' bandaid...  quite literally in this case.  i called hachik to introduce myself (um, of course, because that is what you do).  he managed to successfully subdue his excitement about my impending visit over the phone - but i could sense he was pretty pumped.

i trudged over to his headquarters - determined to look this man in the eye and deem whether or not he was worthy (sorry, i think i fell asleep last night with some warrior movie on, i'm feeling very dramatic and combative - thanks devin!).  i announce myself, and he looks me right in the eye with a firm handshake - - seemingly sizing me up as well.  i noted that he had a similar item in his shop that i have at home (called an 'evil eye' - the blue glass "Nazar Boncugu" or "Eye Bead" worn for protection in Turkey, Cyprus, the Central Asian Turkic Republics, among others).  he cautiously asked me where i got mine.  i explained that a client of mine from turkey had brought it to me - "i am from istanbul!," he proclaimed and *voila* i was suddenly a-okay. 

to be fair, i could tell from the handshake that he was completely above board, and that all of my research had paid off.  he inspected the ring (as well as the fabulous vintage rhinestone earrings i was wearing - yes, YOURS, Mom!), explained what he was going to do, how long it would take and exactly how much it would be.  we chatted for a bit, filled out the paperwork and off i went.

now, international evil eye and vintage jewelry bonding aside - walking out of that place with but a little claim ticket was decidely unsettling.  i just kept thinking....  ummmmm, i just gave my engaaagement ring to a straaaaangerrrrr...  for the next hour i had visions of returning to find some other man there, with "no idea" who this "hachik person" was....  or worse - retuning to a boarded up shop.... i had almost convinced myself of the elaborate hoax he might have perpetrated on me - replete with fake profiles on yelp extoling his expertise and professionalism...  and how he lured me in with that helpful innocent nephew!! 

as the clock ticked away, i began my anxst-ridden return to the shop...  platform stiletto boots dont fail me now!  i walk in to find him carefully buffing my now nearly blinding ring.  i slip it on - - perfect.  i respectfully look for any signs of his work - - flawless.  it looks like the ring was made this size - you cannot, from any angle, discern even the slightest hint that it has been sized.  this is no small feat, considering the diamonds on the band and the intricate design on the sides of the band.  i am not sure what else he did to it - but the metal itself is gleaming - - and the diamonds....  well, they are sparkling almost as much as the irrespressible smile on my face.

ladies - gentlemen - that one person still reading this damned thing (hiiiii Mom!), i do not have enough superlatives for hachik and his amazing work.  don't be fooled by the simple website, or the off-putting characters in the neighborhood - he is an absolute master, craftsman, and gentleman!  he does fine jewelry repair, costume jewelry repair, custom jewelry....  the whole sha-bang.

Hachik Givelekian
ROYAL JEWEL SETTING
http://www.thejewelrysetter.com/

man - i know this is a long blog, but the sunlight was coming through the window and dancing all over this ring - - and i just couldn't stop typing!  it was like a cat and one of those light pointer things.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

we have a ring... we have a date... we have a lot of work.

 wow. so as you probably know, devin carlos voorsanger has *finally decided to make a respectable woman of me and put a ring on it.  i think i have already figured out why many people opt for long engagements...  you know like the 7, 10, 14 year variety.

this isn't like getting a part time job - this is at least a full time job and a half.  it took me just under 5 excruciating hours and literally hundreds of designs / templates / color palettes just to pick a freaking website for the wedding spectacular...  now about how long do you think it will take me to settle on a dress!?!???

i need a drink.